The mind of an overthinker; me.

Today felt like the longest day ever.
I woke up this morning shivering and sweating.
I had to search online about bulimia nervosa..I pulled out my pink laptop from under my pillow, opened it , clicked safari. At first I couldn't type it... My hands were shaking so much. I think though this time I was more afraid of what I might find out. Funny thing, I'm glad I was afraid. When I pressed enter I realized it was on images. The pictures that came up were horrid. Ribs and bones poking out of places that I didn't know was even there.
Now I don't want you to judge me. By all means don't judge me. I don't think I noticed it until now. The self induced vomiting and the pills.
My friend...Thinks she can do it by herself. I used to think she can... I still do, she's a strong person. She hasn't done it for a few weeks but she takes more pills. I didn't know pills still counted as a symptom of nervosa. I still dont see why she started. I'm trying to rem. The exact moment feeling that thats what she wanted. The beginning of my day wasn't new. It was the fourth identical morning in just these past two weeks. I'm still hopping nothing is seriously wrong.
... That was hard, I'm going to sleep.


You are loved; don't give up.
Always,
Sasha